Thank you to the stranger…

Thank you to the stranger that rolled her eyes when she looked at my Daughter today.

The Daisy has her own style. She’s warm but not necessarily wearing what I’d choose. See that’s the difference. Her body, her choice.

I laugh when Rainbow Mama dresses her- jeez she’s had some interesting  combinations.

The Daisy most definately Dances to the beat of her own drum.

image

So yes there you have it, skirt with leggings underneath. A leopard print coat and her umbrella up just incase it should rain!

Who am I to dull her ever glowing sparkle?

I’m her mother not her keeper. One day she will leave our nest. One day she will have the knowledge and the most amazing confidence to go out and live the life she chooses. If our Daughter and the way she chooses to dress offends you visually.  Look away 😉

image

Advertisements

Please don’t test our Daughter.

If you ever have the pleasure of our Daughter’s company, please don’t test her. The Daisy is both enspiring and tiring at the same time. She’s a whirl wind of questions and excitement. She’s colourful and kind. She is stubborn and excitable.

She is many more things to what I can list.

She isn’t an exam paper, she isn’t your judgement on what she is supposed to know.

She isn’t a child to be forced into a round peg hole. She never has been, even when small she was a vibrant soul.

Only yesterday whilst visiting a heritage building with a friend she was casually explaining “old art work” in conversation. A young adult told her friend how cute it was to listen to a child so excitedly talk about history. That’s the Daisy. I don’t teach her, I facilitate. I cannot possibly “teach” her all she will need to know. I can only facilitate her joys at the present time.

I can only educate her on how to research topics. I cannot provide her every answer to whatever question she asks.

Please don’t test her. I have knowledge on alot of stuff however I’m not tested on it. I learn as I go. Please let her learn in whichever way she chooses.

Let her be little, let her be herself most importantly let her choose joy over tests.

image

Half term

Last week was half term. We don’t usually venture out in half term!

Last week was different. We had play dates galore, baking and parties to attend. So not alot to write but as always many photos 😉

image

image

image

Forest school and the disasters of free childcare

image

Before home ed way back when,  I was a slave to the NHS. Sorry I should say an auxiliary nurse supporting the district nurses. I used to love my job then politics got in the way and I began to hate it. I loved the patient care, I disliked the amount of calls I had to make in such a short time frame. I soon  found my position redundant after 6 years service.

Home education was not a planned route for us. I had applied for a school place. The Daisy attended a private day nursery when I worked full time and school to me then was a natural progression from there. Thank goodness I stumbled across HE when I did!

My friends who are teachers weren’t sending their own children to school and I was curious to why. I asked them questions, I did my own research and decided then that the school system wasn’t going to be a path I intended to take for her.

Whilst Home education gives you a lot more freedom than the latter it’s not without its trials.

I work two jobs to primarily fit around her and our lifestyle choices. I work two nights and two afternoons in different employments. With the Night job rainbow mama is at home and the Daisy is in bed. When I work in the afternoons my mum has her. My mum and I clash…. alot. I have no doubt she loves me but I sure as hell know she wishes the Daisy went to school. She doesn’t understand it, she feels she’s missing out on friendships, opportunities- whatever else she thinks at the time. The Daisy has a full diary of events booked well into June this year. She has friends in the village, the surrounding villages and all over the UK.  I wish I could say the same.

Sometimes free childcare aka parents has its downsides…

On the plus side the Daisy had forest school this morning. She played with her friends for two hours with little intervention from us adults. She shared, encouraged and problem solved. She did all this without me or a teacher.

image

Why I don’t write for followers

This is a slightly controversial post. Not for the faint hearted fluffy blog readers of the world. This is how it is.

I don’t write my content to get followers, if I did I’d be pretty screwed by now. I write because I want to write.

Writing is my therapy, it has been for a long while now. I used to put pen to paper I now type on my phone.

I want my blog to be factual for me. Now some bloggers claim to do that. Let me tell you, some use a Canon, good lighting and photo shop.

They write what their followers are interested in.
They fluff their world’s up that much that they begin to believe it themselves.

I do indeed spend alot of time in the virtual world of social media. I can’t deny that, it causes many arguments… many indeed.

I know of a top UK blogger that writes these cushy posts.
I know of her well enough to know that what she is living right now isn’t in her posts. Rather false publishing if you ask me. If her followers really knew the turmoil of her existence as it is now would they read? Probably a few would but not many. How sad is that?

I recently came across a post “how to make your blog work. As real as I try to be ill pop a unedited  screen shot of what I read.

image

*Blogging on a specific niche* what the hell is that. Parenting regardless of how we choose to educate is not one Niche. Or maybe I’ve missed that? They’ll be no cushy rainbow dust and unicorn posts here.

So I’ll contine writing my posts on my Samsung s5. I’ll take photos on the same phone I’m typing on and I’ll be as brutally honest as I can. That is the real insight to me and my world.

I won’t fluff it up with fancy lighting or vocabulary. I swear like a trooper in the real world however I try not to when  writing I try to be as “lady like” as I can.

That’s as artificial as this blog will be. I will attempt to refrain from swearing.  I rarely swear in front of the Daisy and when I fail with that she tells me off!

I was raised listening to The Rolling Stones full blast, in whatever company car my dad had at the time. It wasn’t censored I heard it, I sang it, at the time I didn’t understand it.

The Daisy also listens to uncensored music full blast in the car, she sings it and skips the bad language.

If you do read my blog, thank you! If you only ever read this rant full post then great. If I this post changes the way you will now absorb other blogs then I have kind of accomplished what I originally intended.

image

Let’s talk about the days mummy

“Let’s talk about the days mummy” this is what the Daisy asks me every evening after her bedtime story.

99% of the time I read to her before bed. The odd occasion when we are all out at a gig past midnight or after musical theatre I don’t.

Let’s talk about the days is her way of asking what’s planned. This brings me joy as she has excitement for whatever we intend to do. I also have a list of day to day activities for her, chores for me taped on a kitchen cupboard. She has visual access to this at all times and prompts me to do my housework!

Yesterday I suggested a trip to Wollaton hall, The Daisy suggested a bus ride into town and visit an art gallery. So that is what we did.

image

One of the gallery assistants seemed pleased to see The Daisy again, she commented how nice it was for her to be there and not part of a rushed school group. She also told me about a film to be careful of and perhaps not let the Daisy watch it as it contained nudity. The Daisy read the signage for the film and promptly told me “Mummy I won’t watch that it contains explicit material” the assistant was amazed she could read that- she applauded the Daisy for her ability to read.

The Daisy completed the busy bag at the gallery yesterday. The exhibition was “Monuments should not be trusted” the Daisy was given a baton with hooks on and a plastic wallet filled with laminated art that she had to find within the gallery and then hook on the baton. She really enjoyed this.

When we are at a gallery I tend not to direct it. Why would I spoil what she enjoys. It’s not for me to make her stop at each piece of art and make her look, school children do that. If I wish for her to enjoy galleries when she’s older I need to encourage freedom in her choices at the age she is now.

Next week I aim to leave a day free for us both to have a “day off” and do something, anything that she chooses. So far she has asked for Wollaton hall.

When the Daisy asks me to tell her about the days, I’m going to embrace this. One day she might not want to ask me…

Blowing the cobwebs away

This morning after my night shift, the Daisy and I went on a cold but pleasant walk around our local country park. The Daisy played in the musical garden, counted the wooden mushrooms, accomplished the Identification tree trail, jumped in puddles, fed a cygnet from her hand and looked at the birds through her binoculars.

image

We really enjoyed our walk in nature,  something good for the soul despite being a blustery cold morning.

Her days

image

The Daisy’s days are never the same. That’s what life is really about isn’t it? There’s no two days alike in her world. Today should of been at forest school this morning, it’s January just above freezing this morning, I vouched for a day of real life learning instead.

So today she counted up her saved coins out of her piggy bank. Played with water beads,  had an explore of non messy painting, fed the birds in the garden and totally immersed herself in her new book Roald Dahls the Witches.

We went shopping for food, she paid at the till and helped carry it home. She conversed with several different people and spoke to a friend whilst out.

Later this evening she is going to her musical theatre class but before that she’ll help me cook our evening meal. The most important thing here is she enjoys every step of her day :).

image

Mental health and Me

After reading Leah Burtons blog post about her journey with Borderline personality disorder, I felt what a true reflection it was and that I should in some way help break the stigma too. Please have a read of her post,

http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/your-stories/being-diagnosed-with-bpd/#.Vp9itp-nzqA

I am no professional in this subject.
I have however lived this life for aslong as I can remember, “it” is what makes me who I am. As much as I’d like to hide it and never write about it, I need to face facts that although medication could mask it, it will always be part of me. It could be like carrying a huge suitcase and attempting to hide it, disguise it as something else or I can just be brutally honest with my audience, my friends and talk about it.

Let’s break the stigma. It’s not spoken about enough, it’s misunderstood.

Mental health problems are real. The chances are, you know someone with an illness. If you didn’t,  you now know I have a mental health illness.

I have personally been  misdiagnosed with depression for years. When you are actively trying to fix a “problem” believe you me it’s frustrating to not know what’s really going on. It can be frightening. Now I have my “label” so to speak it is a breath of fresh air. For years I had been treating an illness that didn’t, in reality exist to me. There’s no wonder it wasn’t working. For a while I felt I wouldn’t ever be “fixed” and although that may still be true. I now have the knowledge and understanding that I’m not loosing myself, it has a name and other people also have it too. I understand my triggers, I now know what I need to do to keep my health stable and I know what I need to do when it’s not.

So there you have it, I have a Mental illness. If you already know me, you will probably know my “quirks”. I have a passion for new things that I didn’t understand prior to my diagnosis was any different of a passion than anybody else’s. I knew the down side to the illness I didn’t spot the highs, I thought it was just me.

Mental health illnesses even I’m 2016 aren’t spoken about enough. Children ask questions and sometimes we hush them as we feel they are asking too much. Maybe that is where is stems from? Maybe we were hushed too much from being small that we don’t ask the questions now.

I’m still unsure of why it’s not spoken about. I for one are no longer ashamed.

image

Lists, Olivia and workbooks

This week has been a success- woo hoo!

The lists are working well. I’m ticking tasks off and feeling a little more in control :).

Also this week Olivia the Rainbow doll has been with us for a week. The Daisy has done a similar activity twice before.  Monty the monkey from nursery and also Ranulph the travelling polar bear did his rounds with Home Educated children all over the UK.

Olivia however has been on The Daisy’s wish list since she started at Rainbows last year. So Olivia slept in the Daisy’s bed, had stories read to her and listened to the Daisy play her Guitar.

The Daisy has also received new work books this week which she was most excited about.

image

image

To end the week on a high, we had a dusting of snow this morning when we woke. The excitement on her face was wonderful. ⛄❄👩❤

image